We Can Work It Out: A MORFS Universe Story
By Terry Volkirch
I must be dreaming. I'm flying high overhead wearing nothing but a hospital gown
and I'm exhilarated. The sky is clear and the view is fantastic. I can see my
school. It must be just before the first bell because the campus is covered with
swarms of people. I try to will myself lower so I can get a better look and I
soon notice that I'm all too successful. Everything is getting larger at a
disturbing rate. My arms and legs flail in panic but the rest of my body knows
what to do. It slows down and flips feet first, allowing me to land gracefully.
One girl with long brown hair and dark brown eyes stops to look at me. She looks vaguely familiar. She must be a classmate. I don't remember ever formally meeting her but I surprise myself by knowing her name.
"Hello Jill," I say as I walk up to her and take her hands in mine. As soon as we touch, I know without a doubt that I love this girl.
Her face displays an interesting mix of emotions, confusion being the most prevalent. She hesitates but her curiosity and manners won't let her remain silent for long.
"Do I know you?"
"No," I answer. "But you will."
I jolted awake to find myself back in the hospital room with someone holding my hands. I looked over to see a young blond nurse seated next to my bed. Her eyes were closed and she had one of the most serene smiles I've ever seen. I was about to say something when her eyelids fluttered and she opened her eyes.
Initially, her eyes were pure black. Then I watched as a blue color slowly seeped in to create a normal looking iris. It was mildly disconcerting but thankfully, my staring didn't seem to bother the young woman.
"Hello there," she said. "I'm Sandy. Wasn't that wonderful? I don't know how you two will get together but I'm sure it'll all work out. It always does."
Out of reflex I jerked my hands back away from hers, but the nurse kept her composure.
"I'm sorry if I startled you. I'm a precog but my power only works through dreams. Please don't tell anyone. I only did it for you. I thought it might be helpful to see your future, given your condition I mean."
I must have given her my best confused look because her eyes got very wide at that point.
"Oh, crap! Don't tell me you don't know yet!" Then she ran out of the room, apologizing profusely as she went. It was quite an odd scene. She was a precog but she couldn't predict her sudden distress - or my impending distress for that matter. She must have been looking too far in the future. Either that or making predictions through dreams isn't as accurate as she thought.
After the strangeness wore off, I couldn't help returning to what she said about my condition. What was the big deal? I know I was very sick but I felt much better now. Perhaps she wanted to show me I would live through this. There was going to be a future for me. That was nice of her I guess - nice but not necessary. I wanted her to come back. I had to tell her I'd be okay. I also wanted to find out more about Jill if I could.
My throat felt good so I tried calling out to Sandy. "Hey! Please come back!"
That's all it took. I stopped cold. My voice sounded very wrong. It was much too high. I tried speaking again, this time without shouting, and there it was again. I had a girl's voice!
There's nothing like a good scream to get some attention. I screamed and my girlie voice provoked me to keep screaming until the nice doctors came to help me out with some of their wonderful drugs. It wasn't long before the world went dark again.
* * *
I awoke in my hospital bed the next morning. It was becoming an annoying habit. This time I was aware of my condition but I stayed calm. I'd been unconscious long enough. I felt very good and very well rested. I needed to get home, where I was comfortable and could feel somewhat normal. I noticed the IV was still in my arm but it was a normal glucose solution. No more energy pack for me. MORFS had finished working its magic.
Lying on my back, I surveyed my body without moving. There was no hurry. It was best to take things slowly - get used to myself slowly. My body definitely felt smaller and weaker, and I'd already figured out that my voice was very feminine. There was a new weight on my chest. That meant breasts of course. Then there was the lack of sensation between my legs. The most distinctive male part of me was missing. There was only one conclusion of course. Tears streamed down the sides of my face as I silently mourned the loss of my old self.
Sunlight filtered through the window, making me wonder how many days had passed. I missed my long walks. They helped clear my head so I could think better. Exercise helped the mind anyway. A healthy body makes a healthy mind. There were going to be a long of very long walks in my near future. I'll be spending a lot of time coming to terms with what's happened.
Shopping for new clothes would come soon. That might prove to be a worthwhile distraction. I wouldn't mind testing my sexual preference in the changing rooms, though I suspected that I still liked girls. I couldn't even imagine holding hands with a boy. Ewwwww.
"Oh! You're awake," said a woman, startling me. I'd been looking outside and didn't see her sitting on a chair beside my bed, opposite from the window. She'd been very quietly reading a book.
The hospital must have been worried that I'd hurt myself so they appointed someone to watch me. Well I'm not that unstable. I'd show everyone that I could function as a girl. There was another reason for my forced calm attitude too. I desperately needed to adjust to the new me. I had to fit in and be the best girl I could. My family and home were too important to me. There was no way I'd let a bunch of bigots force us to leave.
"My name is Gwen," said the woman. "I'm here to help if you need it." She didn't ask me my name and I wasn't going to volunteer it. Rob certainly didn't fit any more. I made a mental note to start thinking of a new name and then steeled myself to use my voice.
"Hello," I said, wincing only slightly at the sound. "Are you a nurse?"
Gwen wasn't dressed as a nurse, but she could've been off duty, or she might have been a doctor of some sort. She wore casual black slacks and a dark gray blouse. Her shoulder length gray hair was worn down and she had reading glasses pushed down near the end of her nose. I'd guess her to be in her late 50's but her eyes twinkled with youthful energy. She gave me a quick look and must have decided that I'd be okay because she smiled.
"No, I'm not a nurse. I'm a psychologist, here to help you with your transition. From the looks of things, I'll have an easy job."
I smiled back at the implied complement. Gwen was very nice. I liked her.
"I can't help notice you were crying recently though," she continued. "Would you care to talk about it?"
I explained that I was mourning my male self, and not wallowing in self-pity. I was determined to make the best of things no matter what. Gwen nodded her head and kept a solemn face.
"That sounds like a mature attitude," she said. "But it's okay to be upset... for a little while at least. You've been through a big change."
That was good to hear because I planned on having a major meltdown tonight after I got home, assuming I could be released from the hospital. That led me to start asking all the questions that had been patiently waiting inside my head, starting with what day it was.
I found out it was Thursday morning. I'd been in the hospital a full week. That was a bit shocking, but I kept a brave face. Gwen continued her answer session until I asked if I could go home. I was anxious to get out of the hospital.
"Now that would depend...," she smiled. "How do you feel? Do you feel strong enough to walk?"
"Good question," I countered. "Let's find out."
I swung my legs over the side of the bed and slowly sat up. Then Gwen helped me remove the IV tube. So far, so good. I slid onto the floor and took a short step, then another.
"Hey. I think I'm getting the hang of this walking thing," I said with a little chuckle. Gwen laughed appreciatively but my humor inspired an odd thought. These were my first steps as a girl so it was like I was a baby, walking for the first time. I'd be getting a crash course in girlhood, starting with walking and ending with fashion, with large doses of feminine hygiene along the way.
I hoped I'd be strong enough to walk out without needing help. I wanted to be a good girl but I wasn't going to be weak and dependent like so many of the girls in my school seemed to be. Maybe it was all an act designed to attract a strong young man and make him feel needed. Whatever the case, it wasn't the path for me.
Gwen went out to call my mother and have her pick me up while I stayed in my room to get used to my new legs. It was clear I was ready to leave. I probably wasn't strong enough to walk for very long but I'd make it home. My mom would have to wait for our first mother-daughter shopping trip.
My legs started trembling a little so I sat on the bed and sipped some water that was thoughtfully left for me. I was quite thirsty. I was also reminded that I needed solid food again soon when my stomach started gurgling.
Gwen walked in to tell me the good news about my mom being on her way. She caught me in the middle of a long, loud gurgle and laughed.
"I assume you've had enough walking until your mother gets here. I'll go see about getting some food from the cafeteria. Any requests?"
I gratefully accepted Gwen's offer and told her I'd kill for a bacon and egg breakfast, but I'd make due with some toast, juice and a bowl of cereal - any cereal as long as it didn't have raisins in it. She gave me a last, reassuring smile and went for the food.
I sat alone with my thoughts and waited for my mom. What would I say to her? She must know about me so my appearance won't be a shock, but my acceptance of my situation might surprise her. There really wasn't much use running through all the possible scenarios. The meeting would happen soon enough so I just let my mind wander.
So far, the biggest difference I had to get used to was the weight on my chest and the way my breasts bobbed about. They seemed a bit above average in size. At least they were large enough to throw my balance off a little when I walked. I didn't know if I was more curious or upset at the thought of finding out my cup size.
I was definitely curious about finding out what I looked like. The hospital staff wisely removed all the mirrors from my room. They didn't want me to be overwhelmed by my new appearance. That made sense but I felt like I was past all that. I wanted to see my face.
Gwen returned with breakfast just before I decided to go looking for a mirror. I forgot all about my appearance and focused instead on soothing my savage stomach. I sat on the edge of the bed with a tray full of food on my lap and started on the toast. It was gone in seconds, followed shortly by the orange juice, but the gurgling continued. I had to use extreme willpower to keep from burying my face in the cereal bowl and inhaling it with a single slurp. Yes, I was that hungry.
* * *
Gwen was still waiting with me when my mother arrived. She'd kept me company while I ate, politely ignoring my lack of table manners. Now she stayed in the background until my mother and I could get reacquainted.
I slowly got up, flashed a nervous smile and waited as my mother and I both stood, silently facing each other. Her face betrayed her curiosity and concern. There was so much she wanted to say but she couldn't decide where to start. I, on the other hand, didn't know what to say. I guess I just needed to know that I was still wanted and loved.
"Bobbi!" My mother finally cried, breaking the stalemate. She rushed at me with open arms to hug me. That's when I remembered to breathe again.
It was a wonderful hug. We both cried a little, laughed a little and cried a little more. I'd have to see about hugging more often. I couldn't remember the last time I'd done it.
My mom held me out at arms length and had another good look at me. I inspected her as well. I noticed we were about the same height now, and I found myself wondering if I'd look like her when I got to be her age. She was full figured and in fairly good shape. She didn't work out but she got enough exercise with housework and walks around the neighborhood. Luckily, the mutual inspections only lasted a short time. The silence was becoming unbearable.
"How are you, dear?" she said, turning to look at the table by my bed. She noticed the tray with empty dishes. "Did you get enough to eat?"
"No, not really," I said as my stomach growled in agreement. That produced a few giggles. "But I was hoping to wait until we got home before I had any more food. Is that okay?"
"Of course it is." Then she turned to look at the older woman in the room. "So are you going to introduce us?"
Gwen came over and shook my mother's hand. "I'm Gwen, Bobbi's psychologist. I was assigned by the hospital to look after her."
That's when it hit me. I had a new name. Gwen picked up on it quickly enough. It was a nickname for Robert so it fit, but it was clear I'd no longer be called Rob.
"Nice to meet you Gwen. I'm Janice."
"Nice to meet you too Janice. It looks like the two of you are adjusting very well here but I have to ask about Mr. Sandstrom. How's he been taking it?"
"Not well," my mom confessed.
I wasn't surprised to hear that, but I was surprised that my father had been unusually quiet. He was normally the talkative one in the house. He didn't usually have a lot to say but that never stopped him. My mother liked to describe him as passionate. I supposed that was accurate, if a bit flattering. I preferred to think of him as loud.
"Do you anticipate any trouble with him when he sees Bobbi tonight?" Gwen had to ask.
She was a good psychologist, though the conversation was becoming a bit awkward for me by this point. The two women were talking about me like I wasn't there. I felt an urge to shout that I was still in the room but luckily I suppressed it. I'd normally be happy to be invisible in a room full of adults but for some reason it didn't sit well with me now.
My mother mentioned that there were a few times when my father didn't have much to say. It usually meant that he was thinking very seriously about something. He could be quite impulsive but now he must realize my situation required careful consideration. She was cautiously optimistic about his reaction. I wished I could feel the same way.
The women continued to chat and were only briefly interrupted by the attending physician who came to check me out. Hospital policy required that I be examined before releasing me.
Doctor Johnson seemed like a nice young man in his early thirties, with dark brown hair and a boyish face. His brown eyes were warm and friendly, matching his bedside manner. He gave me a brief examination and turned to speak to my mother.
"Excuse me, Mrs. Sandstrom. I'd like to declare this young lady fit and ready to be released into the world. If you'll just go to registration, they'll have some forms for you to sign. Then you're free to go."
My mother thanked him and Gwen and the two of them left us alone to get ready. Then she turned to reach for a bag she'd left by the door. It looks like she started clothes shopping without me.
She had to estimate my size but she did a very good job. She handed me a pair of plain white panties and blue jeans that I quickly slipped on under my hospital gown. Then she took out a light blue sweater and laid it on the bed while I removed my gown. I quickly grabbed the sweater, faced away from the door and pulled it on, thinking how considerate it was that she wasn't pushing me too quickly into more feminine clothing. It also helped that blue is my favorite color.
"Just a minute Bobbi," my mom said with a frown. "You forgot something."
I turned to see her holding a sport bra. She must have hesitated before taking it out of the bag, knowing I wouldn't like it. It was light blue like the sweater, and not exactly the most feminine article of clothing I've seen. Still, my scowl gave me away. I wasn't exactly happy to see it.
"Go on. Take it," my mother urged. "It won't bite."
I'll say this much for the bra. It was easy to put on. I also had to admit that it held my breasts nicely. Without it, I'm sure they'd be bouncing wildly under my sweater. So the clothing battle was a draw. The feminine undergarment was a necessary evil.
I finished up with soft, short white socks and white sneakers that fit amazingly well. My mom told me she'd brought in a ruler to measure my feet. She also measured her own feet while sitting down to get an idea of what size to get me. She apologized in advance if the fit wasn't quite right. I just thought she was clever. I really was seeing her in a new light.
With the dressing over, I followed my mother out of the room and down the hall to the reception area. My mom filled out forms while I passed the time sitting nearby in a soft comfortable chair. There were a variety of magazines on a small table next to the chair that caught my attention, but I just looked at the covers. Several of them had women with bright smiling faces in all different poses. They reminded me I had yet to see my new face. So began another urge to hunt for a mirror, and this time I wouldn't be denied.
It didn't take long to find one. A full size mirror was mounted on a wall a short distance down the hall. I suspected it was placed there to give people in the reception area a chance to check their appearance before visiting an ailing loved one. I took a deep breath and plunged in.
It took awhile for the image to sink in. A very pretty girl with short, straight lavender hair stood before me. She had striking, dark purple eyes and the cutest little round nose. She was only a little shorter than Rob but a lot more slender, and her slender frame made her large, full breasts stand out very well.
As soon as I got to the breasts, my breath began to come in pants and I felt light-headed. I broke away from the lovely vision and stumbled back to my seat in a daze. I found it more than slightly disturbing to be sexually attracted to myself. I had to force myself to take deep breaths and hang my arms over the side of the chair to relax while the memory of the girl in the mirror continued to haunt me.
The lavender hair color was a little odd but not too odd. Ever since MORFS survivors first developed all the different hair colors, more and more girls started coloring their hair with bold, bright colors. I think it had something to do with all the attention the flashy hair colors received. I'm fairly sure they were competing for male attention. The same could be said for eyes. Colored contact lenses had been popular before MORFS first appeared. No, my appearance wouldn't be a problem. Only my gender change could possibly affect my chances of fitting in, and if I was as attractive as I thought, it shouldn't be an issue with the boys.
Of course as soon as I thought of girl-crazy boys, a chill ran down my spine. Luckily, unpleasant thoughts of boys chasing after me were cut short. I noticed that my mother finished the forms and was saying good-bye to the nurses. That was good timing. It gave me something else to focus on. I followed her lead and added my thanks for taking good care of me. Then we made the long walk to the car.
It was time to say good-bye to this hospital and hello to my interesting new life.
* * *
Security Level: 7
Subject ID: A73DEFG1373D3AF04237
Date: May 3, 2035
Name: Roberta Alexandra Sandstrom
DOB: May 28, 2019
Hair: Lavender, straight
Eyes: Dark purple
Height: 5' 6"/ 168 cm
Power Rating: TBD
Threat Level: Blue
Physical Enhancements: TBD
Specialty Class: TBD
The subject completed phase 2 MORFS in the early morning hours of May 2, 2035.
Doctor Johnson will continue regular checkups to monitor the subject's progress and watch for anomalies.
Projected Outcome: 62% probability of success
The entire MORFS Universe can be found at http://morfs.nowhere2go.org/