Gone with the Wind
(A MORFS Universe Story)
A sharp pungent smell brought me back to consciousness. I opened my eyes and saw Mom’s face right in front of me. She had a worried expression on her face as she looked at me. ‘Why is she does she have that kind of expression?’ Then my memory returned, and I suddenly knew again why I’d passed out. ‘I’m a freak now; I’m not worthy to be alive.’ I started screaming again, but only for a few seconds, because my Dad, whom I even hadn’t noticed yet, gave me a whack with his flat hand on both my cheeks.
That did the trick all right. I stopped screaming, but started crying. ‘I never cry, why am I crying now all of a sudden? Okay, I’ve never been such an abomination before, either.’ Mom hugged me tightly making soft sweet noises while I cried my heart out.
After what seemed like hours to me I managed to slow my crying down to a sob. When I opened my eyes again I noticed that Dad had left my room, I was now all alone with Mom. She turned my head, making me look at her. “Feeling better now?”
In my new sickly sweet high voice I answered in anguish, “No I’m not. Look at me, I’m a freak, an abomination!” Mom shook me hard and said harshly, “Don’t you ever say or even think like that. You’re still our child, even though you are now the daughter I never had.”
‘Oh fuck!. Oops, better not use that word anymore. I even forgot that I didn’t have the same plumbing that I was used to anymore. I had noticed that I was a girl now, but it wasn’t prominent in my mind.’ Now that she mentioned it, I really noticed the differences in my body. I had breasts, not overly big ones, but they were there nonetheless and really noticable. Then there was the absence between my legs. I only noticed it now, as I had earlier been preoccupied with my other changes. Mom asked me, “Do you feel up to being alone for a while? I’m going to get something for you to wear.”
‘Oh no, I’m naked? I hadn’t even noticed that in all of this going on. Of course I’m naked, how else could I have seen how my body looks, stupid.’ “Why wouldn’t I feel up to being alone? I’m a big boy okay.”
Mom asked with a confused look, “Boy?”
“Sorry, I mean big girl Mom.”
She smiled at my slip of the tongue, “Okay then, now stay in bed, I’ll be right back okay?”
I nodded, but as soon as she disappeared from my room I got up and checked the hallway. There was no one in sight, so I tiptoed over to the bathroom to get a good look at my new body in the mirror. I half expected my younger brother Remo to appear somewhere, he would never pass up a chance to get a look of a naked girl. But maybe he wasn’t in the house at the moment. At least I reached the bathroom unseen.
I closed the door, and locked it, apprehensive of what I would see in the mirror, afraid of what I looked like in total frontal nudity. After some deliberating I finally stood in front of the huge wall mirror with my eyes still closed. Then I slowly opened them.
I gasped for breath, seeing what MORFS had dealt me with. ‘I really am a freak now.’ My skin was now covered with a fine downy dark brown fur except for my stomach and chest, there and on my neck and face the fur was of a much lighter shade of brown, almost like the sand on the beach. I had shapely but seemingly powerful legs leading up to wide hips. The tiny waist above it gave me a lot of womanly curves. Then I looked upwards to my bust line. I really had nice breasts, even if they were covered in fur. My nipples were free of fur though, and they looked quite big.
On top of my thin neck was a cute looking head. A slightly upturned nose, dark in color, and big dark blue eyes. My hair was still short, but had changed from blond to dark brown. And everything else on my head except my mouth, the tip of my nose and eyes was covered in fur as well. A movement attracted my attention. ‘Are those my ears?’ They had changed position almost all the way to the top of my head and they looked quite different and a lot bigger. I touched them, finding they were sensitive and very lively.
Then I noticed that my nails were a lot longer. I examined them up close and they were pointy and looked very strong, almost like I had claws now on my fingers. I got worried, ‘Do I have two very long front teeth now too?’ I quickly checked, but other than being perfectly white they looked normal to me.
I stared at my new body for a long time, and noticed that my height was off. I was a lot shorter now. Instead of a big jock, I was now a small diminutive girl. With an emphasis on girl. No one would ever mistake me for a boy anymore. A tear started dripping from my eye. Another movement caught my attention. I forgot all about it. It had been on me all the time, but felt so natural that I hadn’t really even noticed it. I sported a very big bushy tail of the same dark brown color, with a black stripe in the middle. It kept me perfectly in balance it seemed. I turned a bit and saw where it was connected to me in the back. ‘That’s it. I’m never going to show myself to anyone with such a big tail.’
In a panic I tried to run back to my room, but tried to open the door in vain. Then I remembered that I had locked it and unlocked it quickly. I almost flew back to my own room. ‘Boy these legs sure are powerful.’ I jumped back on my bed, sat on my knees with my favorite round pillow clutched to my chest. I had my eyes closed and silently prayed that this was all just a nightmare and that I would wake up soon from it.
Of course I couldn’t wake up from the dream as it was the harsh reality. It became abundantly clear to me, when Mom entered my room once again. “Honey, why are you sitting like that? Is there something wrong?”
I opened my tearstained eyes again, “How can you ask that Mom. I just looked at myself in the mirror.” More tears started to drip from my eyes, making my fur wet and dark.
“Oh honey, I know that this is a lot for you to handle. Just give it some time and you’ll see that it’s not that bad.”
My temper flared up, “What do you mean it’s not that bad! I’m an animal! I’m never leaving my room, ever. Now please go. And don’t call me honey.”
Mom tried to reason, “Sweetheart, don’t act like that.”
I picked up a pillow and threatened to throw it at her, “I said out, Mom, and never call me sweetheart, either.”
Mom looked dejected, but she did leave my room and closed the door. I kept sitting there for some time, looking at the door, still clutching my round pillow. I felt angry at the world for putting me in this situation. I even felt sorry for myself. I was convinced that my life was now officially over. I cried a little more as well, till I noticed something, I stunk. No not that my mood was so foul, I actually smelled bad. ‘Maybe my nose is more sensitive now.’
With aversion, I laid my pillow down and got out of bed. I sniffed around to confirm that it was really me and my nose cringed at the smell of my dirty fur. ‘Man, that is all I need, smelly fur and a sensitive nose to alert me to it all the time.’ Dejectedly, I opened my door and looked around. To my dismay I was still very much naked. ‘That’ll teach me to throw Mom out without giving me clothes first. I’m so stupid! Why didn’t I check the closets first.’ I closed the door again and opened my closets. Though the towels and such were still all there, all my clothes had vanished. ‘What the hell? Where are all my clothes? Are they expecting me to go naked now that I’m an animal?’ I searched all my closets thoroughly, but there was nothing left of my whole wardrobe.
My mood had sunken even deeper and without thinking I opened my door to go to the bathroom again. I was quite startled as I saw Mom standing in the hall. She gave me a wry smile, “I thought you said that you’d never leave your room?”
With a trembling lower lip I answered, “Yes I know that. But I stink, and my nose is taking offense.” I paused and then snarled, “But now that you’re here, tell me where my clothes are. Or are you expecting me to live naked, like the other animals in the barn?”
Mom looked really startled at my outburst, “Honey, how can you think like that? You should know better than to think like that.”
I sobbed, “How would I know? We never had such a freak like me in our family before.”
Mom’s eyes shot fury at me, “For the last time, you’re not a freak, so stop saying that.”
I was startled by her outburst. “Okay, Mom. Any ideas on how I can shower like this?”
Mom grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards the bathroom. “I’ll show you, sweetheart, just let me help you.”
I cringed again,‘When is she going to let up on the whole honey and sweetheart calling.’ Mom didn’t notice and just put me into the shower stall. After she shampooed me, she rinsed it out and grabbed another bottle.
“This one is conditioner, honey, you need to keep all that hair and fur in prime condition.”
Dejected I let her treat me like a baby and just helped a little with the whole shower event. Then came the longest challenge, how to dry all that fur and hair. Mom brought out the industrial dryer and big brush which we usually used for the dogs. Though a bit uncomfortable at first with the hot air, the warm wind felt really nice on my furry skin. When she did my tail I was really enraptured. That felt sooo nice, I closed my eyes and revelled in the feeling.
Too soon for my taste she was finished with it. Then she said to me, “All clean and done, honey.” I opened my eyes and looked at myself in the mirror. I looked even better than before now, with my fur brushed neatly. I looked at myself from all sides before feeling something else that I didn’t like. I had to go really bad. “Um Mom, can I have some privacy now? I need to take care of some business.”
Mom was confused for a moment, but then understood, “Oh sure, honey, but I need to explain some things about that too.”
Now I was confused, ‘I did learn how to do that kind of business a long time ago, right?’ Mom continued, “A girl needs to wipe from front to back and has to wipe after a small business as well. And with your fur …?”
“I’ll manage Mom. If not, I’ll call you if I need your help.”
Some embarrassing moments later, not to mention, smelly ones, I emerged from the bathroom. Mom was waiting for me, “No problems?”
“Nope, I got that down right, I think.”
Mom smiled, “Just wait till you get your period, then we’ll talk again.”
I got frightened. ‘Oh man, I’m a girl, I will have periods! I can even get pregnant, maybe. Oh shit, I don’t even want to think about that, or think about boys. Hell, I don’t even want to think about meeting other people.’
Mom acted like she didn’t see me flinch. “Now I have some clothes here that you can wear for now. But we need to go shopping soon. I just can’t wait to take you out shopping.”
I got frightened even more, ‘She really has gotten into this mother and daughter thing. Now she wants to take me shopping and spend lots of time with me. But I don’t want to go shopping! Other people will see me and treat me like a freak or an animal. Well, it is what I am now aren’t I?’
Mom walked back to my room with me. On the bed some clothes were laid out for me. As soon as I saw them, I stopped dead in my tracks. ‘What the hell? Why does Mom want me to wear a skirt? And that turtleneck is Pink! I don’t want to wear that!’
Mom noticed my aversion and pushed me further along. “Honey, these are the only clothes in your size I could find for now, and even these I had to adjust to your unique physique. So do me a favour, and just go with the flow.
Dejected, I put on the girly underwear and let Mom help me put on the bra and skirt. But inside I seethed with anger. ‘Why have I been dealt such a cruel fate? I hate the world and everyone in it.’
After the embarrassing dressing up, Mom asked me to go downstairs with her. I didn’t feel like it, but I decided I had to do it one time or another, so no time like the present. As I followed Mom down, I had to get used to the stairs. The distances seemed so much farther apart now. ‘No they are not, I’m a lot smaller now.’ Mom went into the living room and proudly announced, “And here she is, finally,” as I followed her in.
I saw my dad and brother staring at me, and immediately I wanted to turn around and run away. ‘Too much attention! Please, don’t look at me!’ I didn’t say anything though, I just kept quiet and looked down to the floor.
Dad came up to me, he was so tall now, and gave me a tight hug. “I will always love you, so don’t be so afraid.”
I looked up at him, “Thanks, Dad.”
Remo kept sitting down but remarked, “Nice tail, Sis!”
I was furious, “What did you just say? What did you call me?”
He got up and when he stood in front of me, I really got scared. ‘He’s so big now, or rather, I’m so very small now.’ He said softly, “I only meant it as a compliment. Don’t start to pick a fight right away.”
I backed down, what else could I do? I was a very small girl, and besides that, he was right after all. I went to my favorite chair and sat down. Mom scowled at me. I noticed and said, “What?”
“You need to remember that you’re a girl now, and that you are wearing a skirt. Here, stand up again.” Sighing, I did as she asked. She continued, “Now sit down again, but straighten your skirt out first like this.” She showed me how and I copied her movements.
Then she shook her head in disappointment again. I was flustered, “What now? I did just as you did, right? Except for my tail, which is bunched up behind me.”
Mom smiled, “Yes you did, but now you’re sitting with your legs apart. Any boy can look straight up to something you don’t want them to see.”
I slammed my thighs closed, mortified, I hadn’t even thought about that. ‘Shit, I really have to learn a lot again.’ Remo was smiling broadly at my lessons. “Don’t smile like that little brother, or I’ll …”
He interrupted, “You’ll do what? You’re smaller than me now, and a lot lighter. Besides, I’m not doing anything.”
Mom saved me, “Yes, you’re quite right. You’re not doing anything. Go take care of feeding the animals.”
Remo whined, “But that was Walter’s job.”
Mom glared at him, “Do you see Walter here? It will be your job from now on.”
Remo just stared at both Mom and me, before swallowing visibly. “Yes Mom, I’ll get right to it.”
I started, “Maybe I can …”
But Mom cut me off, “No you can’t. I don’t want you doing your old chores. You can come with me.”
I was confused and a bit scared, ‘What does she have in mind for me now?’ “Where are we going Mom?”
“To the kitchen, I want you to help me there.”
I pouted, though I didn’t realize it at the time. I wasn’t a stranger in the kitchen, we’d all had to help Mom there at one time or another, but I realized without her saying it, that now she’d expect me to help her there all the time. I followed her and she put me to work on peeling potatoes and carrots. In the meantime Mom started preparing the meat. As she started cooking I found myself sniffing all the different odors and not liking all of them. Especially the meat being fried was offensive to me. It used to be my favorite smells, but not anymore. ‘Maybe I changed into a vegetarian?’
Dad came into the kitchen, “That smells good, here. How long till dinner?”
Mom answered, “About 20 minutes. You need to clean up first. Wal … sorry. Can you start setting the table already, honey?”
Angrily I responded, “I’m not a honey, Mom, so don’t call me that.”
Mom and Dad looked at me. I asked suspiciously, “What, what are you thinking?”
Mom sighed, “You need a new name, honey. You’re not Walter anymore. How about the name of my favorite grandmother? Her name was Sinthia.”
I repeated, “Cynthia?”
Dad piped in, “Yes Sinthia, but spelled as Es, Eye, En, Tee, Aitch, Eye, A.”
I thought about it. ‘It’s better than Walter. I always wanted a cool name, This isn’t exactly cool, but it’s different and exotic. I do like it.’ “Okay Mom, I’ll accept it, thanks.”
“That’s settled then. Now Sinthia, can you start setting the table please?”
“Yes Mom, right away.” And I started to get the plates and utensils. Soon most of the things were on the table and Mom and Dad put the heavy pans on the table. As everything was set, Remo came in and washed up for dinner. We sat down at the table and said grace.
After that Remo said impatiently, “Load me up please, I’m hungry. How about you Bro … I mean Sis.”
Mom scolded him, “Remo, be more patient. And please remember that Sinthia is now your sister.”
Remo was surprised, “Cynthia?”
I said softly, “Mom said she’d like to give me the name of her favorite grandmother, Sinthia which is spelled: Es, Eye, En, Tee, Aitch, Eye, A.”
My little brother looked at me, “Nice name, Sis. So how are you feeling?”
“Okay I guess. It’s still a lot to take in. I still feel weird in this body.”
Mom interrupted, “No more talking, eat!”
I tried a little from the meat that Mom put on my plate, but I didn’t like it anymore. I gave it all to Remo who was surprised, but appreciatively nodded thanks. Mom looked at me as I did that, so I explained. “I think I am going to be a vegetarian now, Mom. Sorry.”
“There is nothing to be sorry about, honey. Just eat the rest of your dinner.”
I sighed, ‘She’s still calling me honey, I wish she would stop.’
The rest of the dinner was pretty quiet and uneventful. But when I got up to gather the plates to bring them to the kitchen, I brushed on something with my tail. Remo exclaimed, “Hey, watch it with that big thing, will you.”
I felt mortified, ‘Oh how can I ever get used to this. It’s so horrible.’ I didn’t let anyone see that I was feeling so awful again, but hurried to the kitchen with a full load. There I saw the knife Mom had used for the meat. It was such a big knife and I picked it up looking at it. ‘I bet I can plunge this deep enough inside me, so I’ll die quickly. I don’t want to live like this. It’s better for everyone if I just kill myself here now.’
I raised the knife high up above my head, ready to plunge it quick and deep into my heart.
End of Chapter 2
To be continued...
The entire MORFS Universe can be found at http://morfs.nowhere2go.org/