Nist’s Disclaimer of chocolaty goodness:

 

Ok, I’ve tried something a little different with this one. Usually with my time lines I try to keep it as linear as possible, with flashbacks clearly defined as such and with indications as to how it fits into the main linear timeline. However in this chapter, I wanted to try and show Sara’s mental patterns being disrupted somewhat by writing things in a not so clear manner. In places the section jump between various points in time, from the stories present back to a point in Jace’s past. Chances are, its going to confuse the heck out of a lot of people. Its going to annoy a bunch more, probably almost as much as when they get to the end of the story and read that the whole morfs incident was just a dream … Ok, I’m cheap, but not that cheap.

 

Well, seeing as I have already interrupted the start of this story with my disclaimer, I will hold off the start for a few lines more, by saying a big thank you to Brit for creating a universe that inspired me enough I managed to get the guts to submit  a story for, and to Holly Logan, whose editing talents mean the story makes a hell of a lot more sense, has better grammar, and isn’t totally full of British slang, which I don’t even realise I use and that sometimes means something totally different over on the other side of the pond.

 

And finally a big thanks to everyone who has written comments to me. I appreciate every one. Especially the constructive ones as I’m always ready to improve.

 

Thanks.

 

OK, enough with the soppiness, it goes all against the hard arse image I’ve worked hard to build for myself. On with the story!!!

 

Enjoy

 

Part 5 - Pink is my least favourite colour.

 

“So. Tell me, how do you feel?”

“How I feel?”

“It must be strange.”

“Must it?” I looked at the leggy blonde women sitting in the leather arm chair. She was immaculately dressed in a black business suit, her jacket open revealing the light pink of the top underneath. She had a notepad in her left hand, the tip of the pen in her other hand resting just over the top of its surface. “Well it’s a little soft …”

“Soft?”

“Yep.” I put a hand on the leather couch I was lying on and pushed down. “I always thought these leather couches were going to be harder than this.” I had carefully sat down in my short denim mini and swung my legs around. Now I was twiddling with the strings on my hoody.

“Leather couch? No, I was talking about you. How do you feel?”

“About what? Coming to see a shrink? Can’t say I’m overly thrilled by the idea, but I was hardly given a choice in the matter.”

“Does that upset you?”

“Upset me? Yes! It annoys me. I had plans for this two hour period that I had to cancel last minute.”

The women made a note. “Would you like to talk about what happened in the hotel?”

“No, I can’t say I do.” Dad had said I should talk about anything I wanted with her. I turned my head to look around her room. It was nicely decorated, the wood panelling on the bookshelves almost looked real. He hadn’t shown me in, mind, just left me at the door.

“I would like to.” I looked at the woman again

“I’ve been trying to forget that incident …”

“OK then. Back to my first question, how do you feel?”

“About what?”

“Let’s start with something simple, then.” She sighed, “You were born a boy, raised a boy, then two weeks ago MORFs made you into a girl. How does that make you feel? Annoyed? Angry? Hurt?”

“Nothing. Doc, I don’t feel any different now then I did 2 weeks ago. Oh, certain parts of me jiggle more, but I’m the same person.”

“Tell me about your nightmares.”

“My what?”

“It’s in your file.”

“Oh? I have a file? Can I see?”

 

****

 

“Fire?”

“Water.” I replied with a sigh.

“Earth?”

“Air.”

“Black?”

“White.” Never get the point of word association.

“Mum?”

“Dad.”

“Pink?”

“Grey.”

 

****

 

When the phone rang, she smiled, apologised, then picked it up. After she listened for a moment, she said, “OK”.

I was staring around the room again, I had been there 30 minutes and I was bored already. Then I heard a thrap and felt a dull ache in my arm. Looking down, I saw a pink feathered dart sticking out of my arm. I reached out to pull it out, but my arm felt heavy and laden.

I stood up made 3 steps towards the door and collapsed. “Why?” I asked, my voice slurring.

“Take her to the institute quickly, and be careful! That drug shouldn’t last more then half an hour,” she said, looking at someone behind me. “Once you’re out of the area, get her tied up in a straight jacket. This girl is a cold blooded killer and will not think anything of killing you like she has others.”

“If she is such a killer, why can’t we tie her up now before we go?”

“Because I said so. Go!”

 

****

 

They didn’t waste any time. I was placed in a wheelchair and rushed to a white van, in which my limp and un-responding body was driven out of town. I had tried to scream for help, but all that happened was I made grunting noises and dribbled a lot. As soon as we hit the freeway one of the men climbed into the back and started to put me into a straight-jacket. Of course they helped me out of my skirt and jumper first. If I hadn’t been drugged I would of killed them.

“Ever thought about doing one of these fuck ups on the way to the institute?”

“A few times, yeah, but you never know what diseases they got.”

“I’m willing to bet she’s pretty clean.”

“She might be, but don’t bother taking the risk. Besides you’re married what do you need a little extra marital for.” He started to pull all the straps tight until my limp body felt like I wouldn’t be able to free myself, even if I had control. I knew I wasn’t going anywhere, so now would be the best time to get myself some extra time. I closed my eyes so he couldn’t see what I was doing, which is about the only part of my body that would respond and went to that place in my mind that I had discovered on Thursday. The man’s ministrations on my body sped up; his and the driver’s voices raised a few octaves and sped up to the point of only just being understandable. I thought back to what had caused this, the actions at the hotel the week before compounded by the recent hectic days.

 

****

 

Thursday was probably the worst. After being pistol whipped unconscious, I had come round to discover my boyfriend and my new best friend had both been kidnapped. I had rung my father, then stormed over to the OTI to find out what was happening, only to discover that nothing was. I met Mel’s dad in the elevator and followed him down to my father’s office.

“They’ve found her, Slash. Let’s go hurt them!” Mel’s father said to my own.

“No.” my father said with his back to Pain.

“No? Slash, the police have cornered them in a office down on the upper side. We can storm that place easily. They are being held in the upstairs boardroom and …”

“We can’t. The police are onsite, we can’t interfere.”

“But?”

“We have our orders.”

“Slash?! Damn you, then I request a leave of absence.”

“You need to give me at least 24 hours notice, Pain. I need you here.”

I didn’t hear anymore after that, I was making my way to the locker room I had used the day before.

 

 

 

****

 

The feel of the engine purring between my legs had caused me to purr myself, as I throttled the bike’s engine down the road towards the police road block. The bike was all black like myself, I had helped myself to the combat armour that I had been given the day before for the gauntlet run, and then sneaked into stores and ‘acquired’ the necessary accoutrements so that the only part of my body visible was my eyes and even those were covered by the helmet’s darkened visor. I had also stopped by home on the way and raided my parents armoury. That was probably going to get me into the most trouble, but I felt it had to be done.

Swerving, I heard swearing coming from a cop as I dodged around him and headed towards the building, a small office block my friends were being held in. I used a pile of planks leaning against a skip to jump the bike through the second floor window of the office. As soon as my rear wheel left the plank the world paled and slowed down. I could see the shocked expressions on the faces of the armed men inside the building as the bike and I broke through the glass. I kicked off the bike and somersaulted backwards, my hands drawing the first two of the pistols strapped to my legs. As I hit the apex of my jump I had the two guns out, aimed at the first two people I saw. I pulled the trigger. As I headed down, I aimed at two more and pulled again. as I hit the ground, I spun and fired two more shots at the last two men. All 6 fell to the ground.

From Mel’s dad’s comments I knew my friends weren’t down, so I headed for the stairs. I moved quickly and took the stairs two at a time, turning to shoot the two men at the top of the stairs which doubled back on itself. The world was still moving in slow motion. 4 men were running down the corridor, and I had 4 rounds headed in their direction before they even realised what was happening.

As I charged in through the door into the board room, I could see Mel and Kail tied up at the far end, the 4 men in the room were looking at me, one with his hand out. Colour returned to the world with a slap.

“… Where did she come from?”

“It’s OK. I have her. She is not going anywhere.” I dropped to my knees. Flash.

 

 

****

 

The driver had taken great joy in manhandling me into the wheel chair. The colours had returned to the world as we came to a stop. 

“Didn’t the Doc say it would only last 30 minutes?”

“Yeah.”

“Well she is no more responsive then when we put her in.” They were pushing me into what looked like an old manor house.

“She’s probably faking it so we will drop our guard.”

“Yeah, probably.” I tried to sigh as I dribbled into the uncomfortable straight jacket, I hadn’t noticed till I was plonked into the chair, but this straight jacket was real uncomfortable on the tail.

 

 

****

The flash receded from my vision.

“Hey, she’s coming back round.”

“Must be mentally stronger than I thought.”

I tried to rev up but I was being blocked, something was stopping me. “She is pretty strong” said the voice of the guy who had had his hand out at me. I felt pain as I tried to speed up or just move. Neither worked, I retreated from the pain into a place which calmed, relaxed, the world brightened up. “She’s gone again.” The words were spoken quickly, like they had been sped up. I felt the pressure on me fall away. A pressure I hadn’t even known was there till it no longer was.

“I think the cops are planning something.” A voice said, I didn’t dare lift my head to see where from.

“Oh?” another man said.

“Yeah, I can sense some disturbances in the crowd.”

“Maybe it’s time for us to leave?

“Kill the girls, we can leave them as evidence of our resolve.” The colour drained from my vision and once everything was just a paler version of itself. I moved, first to the neutraliser, who had a very shocked expression on his face when my fist slammed into him. I imagine it was even more surprising to him to find himself flying out through the window. I smiled at the gormless expression on the 2nd guy’s face as I jumped over the table, swinging my body around to give me maximum leverage and motion in my shin, aimed to collide with his stomach. As he tumbled backwards I pulled out another of my guns and shot him in the chest. I rounded on the last guys in the room, both of whom were holding a gun to Mel’s or Kail’s heads. I had my last gun out and in my other hand, so I could aim one gun at each of the two men. I slowed down my time as one of them started to speak.

“You are fast, but are you fast enough to stop both of us from shooting your friends?” the one on the left laughed. I recognised him as the one who had pistol whipped me.

“You might be able to save one of your friends, but you won’t save both. So you have a choice. Save one and lose the other, let us go, or force us to kill both of them,” finished the one on the right. “I choose door D.” I snarled as the colour completely drained from my vision.

“Door D?”

 

****

 

“Yes, the option where I take the guns from your hands, then beat the living crap out of you.” I was now perched on the edge of the board room table, one leg crossed over the other, the two pistols they had held now sitting on either side of me. “Fortunately for you, you are not worth the effort.” I pulled one of my own guns up, aimed at the leader and pulled the trigger. A moment later he was on the ground. “Unfortunately for you,” I turned on the petrified looking last man, “you thought it would be a good idea to pistol whip me.”

 

****

 

“What did they do to him?” I asked Mel as I untied Kail. He was unconscious, though his breathing and heart rhythm were regular.

“He kept making demands, so that neutraliser turned on him”

“Demands?”

“ ‘Let her go and I’ll come with you without a fight’, that sort of thing.”

“Oh ... Fool.”

“Yep,” Mel agreed with a grin

“Cute though.” I looked in the direction of the door when I heard a voice shout, “Stop and lay down. Police.”

“Yep,” she nodded, “We’re safe, probably not a good idea if you’re caught here … especially dressed like that,” I nodded in agreement. “Sar … Grey, Thanks.”

 

****

I stepped out of the door to the board room, saw the SWAT team coming towards me and sped up. While they seemed to stand still, or mid air in one their cases, I retrieved my pistols and the bike and got the hell out of there. I pushed the bike till I was out of sight in a dark alley, then came out of fast time. That was something I would regret later. I could feel myself being pulled towards that comfortable place where everything else moves quicker, I fought it, climbed on the bike and drove as quickly as I safely could away from the police and the road block. A white van had suddenly pulled out in front of me, the back door opened up and my father, dressed similarly to myself, waved me in after pushing a ramp out. I swore. As soon as the bike and I were in, the lecture began.

“And what was you thinking young lady?” my father yelled in the back of the van. “We received expressive orders, we were NOT to interfere.”

“Slash, may I?” Pain asked. My father nodded. “Sara, Thank you.”

“What?” Dad and Mum, who was driving, asked at the same time.

“Slash, we received orders, We weren’t to interfere. Sara, isn’t one of us. She may be your daughter, and your responsibility, but your orders don’t apply to her and you didn’t tell her she couldn’t.”

“Grr” my father growled, then turned back on me. “You are grounded until further notice, and there will be no dressing up as a Ninja without prior permission from your mother or I. Understand?” Flash, I couldn’t hold it back any longer.

 

****

 

“New inmate for you.”

“What’s up with her?” a nurse asked.

“Nothing, she’s faking it. The Doc shot her with a tranq, but that was over an hour ago, she said it would only last 30 minutes,” driver boy said, giving me a slap to the head. The nurse pushed him away and shone a torch in my eyes, one then the other.

“She’s not faking it, her eyes are barely responding. Get her down to the on duties office.”

 

****

 

Flash, I slowly opened my eyes and looked down, I regretted it immediately. Ignoring the thumping in my ears The black body armour had been replaced with a flowery tiny pink dress and white stockings. Looking around the room I was in, I saw a large mirror dominating one wall with the couch that I was sitting on directly opposite it. There was a door to my right and another to my left. I groggily stood up and looked into the mirror. My hair had been put into pig tails, with bright pink flowers I looked down at my feet, encased in a pair of bright pink 3 inch heeled shoes with an ankle strap. Next to my feet was a bright pink hand bag with a big white flower on it. As I bent down to pick it up, it started to vibrate and I could hear a phone ringing inside.

“Ahh, good you’re awake, right on time.” My mother’s voice said over the line when I answered the phone I found in the nearly empty bag.

“Why am I dressed like a Pinky?” I asked, butting in.

“We are in the restaurant, why don’t you come out and join us.”

 

****

 

“An hour you say?”

“Yes, Doc, bit longer, maybe.”

“And you haven’t given her anything?”

“Nope.”

“That woman has a lot to answer to; the drugs are still strong in her body, at this rate she will probably be out of it till tomorrow. Well, at least doing a physical on her will be easier, she won’t fight back. Get her onto the inspection table, and get her out of that straightjacket.

 

****

 

“Would you like anything?” My father asked as I sat down.

“To go home and get changed into some acceptable clothes would be swell.”

“Not happening dear, we are going to have a nice meal first,” Mum answered. I looked at her, dressed in a black sleeveless dress.

“You look very pretty, Sis.” I gave James a dirty look, he was dressed in a navy blue shirt, with the sleeves rolled up. “You do.”

“Turd! Do you remember how much I hate pink?”

“Sara. ...”

“Mother. Do you still feel that dressing me up as some kind of Pinky is going to make me suddenly act all girly?”

“I thought you would like that dress. It is very modern.”

“Why the hell would I like it? It’s Pink! My hair is in pigtails, with big Pink friggin’ flowers. Why the hell would I like it?” I snarled at my mother, keeping my voice low enough not to be overheard.

“Because I like it. It’s very pretty,” she smiled

“No, its incredibly ugly.”

“Girls.” Dad interrupted. “Sara, you will sit there and you will look like you are enjoying yourself. That dress was the best we could come up with on short notice.” I stopped scowling at my Mother and looked at my Father, who had a serious expression on his face.

“Cherry Coke, please.” I sighed

“That’s better. Take a look at this menu and decide what you are going to have.” He passed me the menu.

 

****

 

“Doctor! Come quickly, Janna has cut herself again.”

“Damn that girl!” He sighed, “Ok, I’ll be right with you.” He pulled his fingers out from inside my vagina and pulled off the rubber glove. “I’m going to have fun doing the full rectal examination on you, young lady. Even in this drugged state, your body is incredibly reactive.” He quickly groped a breast and was gone. I shuddered the moment I heard the door shut. After being stripped naked I had been plonked on my back on the bench, my legs were placed into the stirrups and strapped down. They had moved up to do the wrist and chest straps when the doctor stopped them, saying in my drugged state I would be no problem and the straps would be in the way of a complete inspection. I don’t know what sort of doctor he was, but he spent ages poking me, feeling my ribs, my chest, taking my temperature in every orifice, shining a light in my eye. It took all of my self control when he started sticking fingers in my vagina. Hell, I hadn’t even done that, yet. I sat up carefully and released the ankle and thigh straps, then lay back down, and let my eyes close, ‘Damn this drug’.

 

****

 

Suddenly a memory hit me like a ton of bricks.

“MUMMY!! Where are you?” I had been playing with a doll next to a bench, I had turned around, smiled at her then turned back to look at the doll, I turned back to look at my mum again and she was gone. I had dropped the doll and was looking for her. “Mummy?” I was near crying.

“Hello, little girl.” I looked up at the man in front of me. “I’m Uncle Jimmy, your Mummy sent me to get you.”

“She did?”

“She sure did. Would you like a lolly pop?” I stood up and smoothed out my pink dress like mummy had shown me.

“A Lolly pop?”

“Yes, I have one in my car for you, it’s just over here.”

 

****

 

I opened my eyes when the door slammed shut. “Damn girl,” the doctor muttered as he crossed over to me. “Well, it’s been long enough to be able to make an accurate guess at how long that drug will be in your system.” He picked up an empty needle and took a blood sample from my arm. Again, it took all my self control but I stopped myself from tensing up. I waited till he put the sample into the terminal and started processing it before I slipped my legs out of the straps. The world dulled as he picked up the machine’s output.

“Hmm well according to this your body is … clear of the tranq ... Oh shit!” He looked up at the bench, but I had already moved off of it.

 

****

 

Dad had attached a small note to the menu, ‘If something happens, get your brother out of here.’ I looked up at him. His head was in my direction but his attention wasn’t. It was across the room. “I think I will have the Soup of the day …” I said to him.

“And for main?” Dad asked.

“Not sure … the steak sounds nice.”

 

****

 

“I don’t know how you fooled my first test, but you won’t be able to escape.”

“Oh?”

“A killer like yourself doesn’t stand a chance, Even if by some miracle you get out of the building there would be a massive man hunt out for you.”

“So what is the incentive for me keeping you alive then, Doc?” His wide eyed expression made it so worth it.

 

****

 

“Sis, if you hate that dress so much, wanna swap?”

“What?” James’ offer brought me out of my musing.

“Wanna swap? I’d love to wear something like that. It’s so pretty.”

“Well you are not that much smaller than me, and those clothes do look a little loose on you …” I grinned.

“No.” Mum said

“But …”

“No! You two will sit there and look like you are enjoying your meals.”

“So, why are we here, really?” I asked.

“Hopefully for no reason other than to enjoy a good meal.”

 

****

 

Crash! I slammed backwards through the fire exit.

“James, this way!”

“But Mom and Dad …” I ground to a halt.

“Mom?” I rolled my eyes, changed my grip on my little brother from his wrist to his waist, and lifted him over my shoulder. “We don’t have time to worry about them, they can take care of themselves.” I started sprinting down the alley towards the main road.

“But… You just ran. Put me DOWN!! You’re a coward.”

“If you say so, Kat.” I felt the tears on my cheeks. I put him down just before we got to the end of the alley. “Do you have any money?”

“No! We should go back to help Mum and Dad!”

“Help them do what?”

“Well?”

“James, you’re 12, and I’m dressed in this Pink monstrosity of a dress. Neither of us can help, we would just be in the way.”

“But …” I passed him the note from the menu. “Oh …”

“I’m following orders. I want to be back there as much as you do.”

“Well, we got out of there, let’s go back in.”

“Dad given you his intentionally misinterpreting orders speech yet?”

“Mum did …”

“We are about 20 minutes from the evaluation center.”

“We are walking?”

“Yep.”

“But you will ruin your shoes.”

“Ahh, what a pity.”

 

****

 

The windows had bars on them. From what I could see I was on the 3rd floor of the building. I turned to see the doctor dive for the desk and hit something. I heard the sound of gas valves opening, releasing gas into the room rapidly. I took a deep breath from near the window and went into that place in my mind where the world brightens. I saw the doctor grin, then fall unconscious, 5 seconds. I dropped to my knees and then fell sideways, my eyes locked onto the closed door, hopefully my head was obscured by the desk. 7 seconds. The world brightened even more to the point where I couldn’t really make out colours, just outlines. 15 seconds ... 20 seconds, the doors opened, and I let the world dull somewhat just as two men walked in, both in orderly uniforms. I realise they are both wearing gas masks. I was glad I had taken and held that breath. 21 seconds, both are away from the door. So I switched from the comfortable place to the other side where the world dulls, I go to the point where the colour had almost gone.

 

****

 

“Remind me that I owe Mum some serious payback for these shoes.”

“Probably help if you took smaller steps.”

“I want to get there as soon as I can. I don’t like not knowing what’s going on”

“But we never know what’s going on.”

“Just because I’m used to it, doesn’t mean I have to like it.” We walked in through the sliding doors of the testing center and up to the receptionist. “Hi, I’m after Dr. Darkwater.”

 

****

 

I was regretting not paying attention on the way in. Getting out of the office had been easy, but finding my way out the building had been so far, very difficult.

“You shouldn’t be here …” a woman’s voice said from behind me.

“Tell me something I don’t know.” I had ducked into one of the patient wards; no one had been following me, so I turned to look at the person who had spoken. The white haired women was startlingly beautiful. She was dressed in the simple grey smock of the inmates/patients and was staring at me with deep golden eyes. “Do you know a way out?”

“The same way you came in, Grey. But by a different method, perhaps.”

“Hannah, you know you are not supposed to leave your bed,” a nurse muttered as she came over from her station. She looked at me “How did you get in here, Sweety?” she asked with a smile.

 

I looked at her and smiled. She was a little bigger then me, but I needed some clothes.

 

****

 

“Kids, your parents are fine.” A young man in a pin strip suit stated as he walked into the waiting room.

“What’s happening?”

“Young lady, you don’t need to know.”

“Try again.”

“What?” he asked with a condescending smile.

“Try again. Only this time, answer my question properly!”

“Your parents are fine, that’s all you need to … urk.”

“Ok. Let’s try this one more time, only this time, every time I hear something that doesn’t really answer my question, I’m going to hit you again. Understand?”

“What are you?” I punched him in the stomach again, then brought my hand up in front of his eyes and extended my claws.

“No, that’s not the yes/no answer I was expecting. Do you understand?”

“Yes, you crazy bitch.”

“Ok, are my parents really fine?”

“Yes.”

“What is happening?”

“Right now, mop up.”

“Clean up the scene of the incident so no unnecessary evidence remains?”

“Yes. Now please let go of my cock.”

“How long are James and I going to be stuck here?”

“Until someone who knows you can verify who you are.” I let go of him and pushed him towards the door before heading over to the sink to wash my hand. “I suggest you go change. You need to learn better control over yourself.”

 

“What did you do to him?” James asked as I moved over to sit next to him.

“This.” I looked my little bother in the eyes, I let time speed up a touch, opened my mouth and snarled, baring my teeth. His eyes went wide, so I pulled back and returned to normal with a smile.

“Damn, with your eyes all black like that, that’s scary.”

“All black?”

“Yeah, the whole of your eyes turned black like they did that time in the corridor.”

“Cool.” Bang. The door slammed open and pinstripe was stood in the doorway holding a pistol.

“Payback time, bitch!” he pulled the trigger, my eyes went black and the colour drained from the world. There was a flash of light from the gun, I pushed James away from me and onto the floor out of my estimated path of the round, I then pushed of the couch and ran straight at the burk, dodged the round, kicked the gun from his hand. The colour returned to the world as I started to punch him. In the moment before it landed, shock flickered onto his face, he lifted up into the air, and then crumpled onto the ground when he landed.

“Chicken shit.”

“Ouch.”

“Shit, you OK, James?” I rushed over to see if he was alright.

“Yeah, tables not going to be, though. What happened?”

“Dumb fuck there tried to shoot me.”

“He out?”

“Yep, I think I broke his jaw.”

 

****

 

Nurse’s uniforms suit me. I don’t know what they had been instructed to look for, but everyone seemed to be ignoring me as I made my way through the corridors towards what I hope was the exit. I was trying to be quick without seeming out of place. I had gagged the nurse and put her in one of the spare inmate’s smocks before securing her to the bed. No telling how long it would be till she was discovered and I wanted to be as far away as I could possibly be. ‘Damn’it where is that exit?’

 

****

 

 

“Mum …”

“Yes, dear,” she said with a sigh as I stood in the doorway.

“Here’s that disgusting dress … You didn’t borrow it from someone did you?”

“No, we bought it for you.”

“Oh good.” I dropped the rolled up bundle onto the floor, just inside the doorway.

“Would you hang it up so it doesn’t get ruined.”

“Oh, there is no point in me doing that, Mum. Night.”

“What do you mean there is no point in you doing that?”

“Night, Mum,” I called out as I ran up the stairs.

“SARA! Get back down here right now.” I sighed, and headed back down. She was holding up the multiple pink strips and rags that the dress was now. “What’s the meaning of this?”

“I had some difficulty taking it off.”

“Some? Sara this was a perfectly good hundred dollar dress you just destroyed.”

“So? You’re not going to be happy that the shoes had an accident, either.”

“Accident?!” I think she was getting angry. ‘Well screw her! I think I have been very clear on my position on pink.’

“Yeah, the heels got accidentally ripped off, the soles were then snapped in two and soaked in a sink of water. Meanwhile, the buckles were bent.”

“Sara. I think you had better go to bed,” my dad suggested behind my mum. I could see from his eyes he was a little annoyed.

I climbed up the stairs, walked up to my bedroom door, then sneaked back to the stairs to listen in.

“… dred dollars for a dress you knew she would hate?”

“I didn’t know she would hate it. I thought, and Kat agreed, it was a really pretty dress that suited her.”

“It was Pink! Jace hated Pink, and we both know Sara’s personality is not so different from Jace’s. She hates pink just as much. Hell, we have discussed it enough times, and we both know why he hated pink so much.”

“It’s just, I thought if she could see how pretty it made her, she would stop resisting me.”

“Love, she is not resisting you. Hell, I saw what she was doing when you were giving her advice on her make up the other day. She absorbed it all. She listened to what you said, and then combined it with what her friends told her and found her own path. We have been after the kids to do that their whole lives, why do you want it to stop now?”

“I thought this would make us closer.” Mum was sobbing.

“You are only driving her away. While I am annoyed about the fact she just destroyed the dress, at the same time, she is old enough to decide what she is going to wear. You are going to have to let go.”

“I would have loved to have seen her face when she looked in that mirror for the first time.”

“I think being in that toilet at that very moment might have been dangerous. Knowing our eldest, I reckon we may have been sitting with a naked young lady for dinner if she hadn’t realised we were also working.”

“I guess we let her off. I should have been more considerate.”

“No, she owes us for that dress. She didn’t have to destroy it. At this rate, I won’t need to worry about paying either of them any allowance for quite some time.”

I tried to sigh quietly and make my way to bed. ‘I gotta stop letting my temper get the better of me.’

 

****

 

“Nice try, little girl, but no nurse would come down here with the escaped prisoner alarm going off.” I was surrounded, two men behind me and 3 men ahead, no doors to the left or the right. Narrow corridor, wide enough for 3. A quick look revealed all five armed with nightsticks, possible stunner on the ends. The talker was also armed with a holstered pistol of some sort. Each had cuffs attached to his belt.

“I’m new, I got lost.”

“Hey boss, look at her. We can take her,” said one from behind.

“Command said to wait for backup. This one is dangerous. We are to keep her here until they arrive.

“I’ve decided I don’t like how you treat your prisoners here so I’m quitting. I’ve handed in my notice and …”

“Don’t bother, girl. You have already been positively identified by the nurse who saw you come in, and by the one you stole the uniform from,” the speaker stated.

“Fine. I give up then.” I put my arms behind my back, wrists close as if to be cuffed from behind. “I guess there is no point in trying to fight.” One of the guys behind me carefully came up, placed the cuffs onto my wrists and then lammed me into the wall and hit me with his stun stick.

“See? Told you she would be no trouble.” I felt blood running down my face, my nose hurt and my eyes were watering. “I wonder what she is like. I’m claiming her.”

“Fine, be quick about it though. We don’t have all day.”

“I bet you are still a tight little cock teasing slut.”

 

****

 

“Where is my Lolly?”

“Come here, sit on my lap.”

“No!” I said.

The man reached out and grabbed me and pulled me onto his lap. “Now be a good little girl and … Ow, you bit me!” Smack, his hand smacked me across the face. “Little slut now I’ll show you what you are your sinful ways do to a man. I bet you are still a tight little cock teasing slut.”

 

****

 

Something snapped inside of me, I started to growl. My knee shot up and caught him between the legs. His eyes went wide as he began to collapse. My hand caught him by the throat, I picked him up one handed and threw him into the remaining guy behind me. My other hand acquired his nightstick.

“Shit!” one of the men said, looking at me, I turned to look at him. Colour faded away as I saw the movement of the guy drawing his gun. He slowed right down and before he had even really gotten started drawing the weapon, I was throwing the nightstick underarm at his wrist.

 

****

 

“Jace! I’m so, so sorry.” Mum picked me up and wrapped me in her arms. Ignoring the bloody marks my hands and claws left on her clothing I started to sob into her.

“Mummy! Don’t leave me again.”

“It’s OK, baby.” She started to walk away, I looked over her shoulder at the bloody mess of the man, his body contorted in pain, his blood splattered all over the inside of the car. He was making a gurgling sound.

“I don’t want to play this game any more” I cried.

 

****

 

When the colour returned the corridor was a bloody mess, broken bones were sticking out of limbs, unconscious bodies were thrown all over and I was standing in the center of it all, looking down at the scared little man who had threatened to rape me. He was still conscious, his limbs were at odd angles but he was still conscious. He was crying.

I turned from him, heading towards the far end of the corridor. I looked down at the two cuffs on my wrists, the joining chain had been snapped off at the point where it joined the left cuff. Must have been a weak weld. I had acquired two nightsticks in my fight with the security men and now held them comfortably in my hands as I headed towards what I hoped was the exit.

 

****

 

“Dear, you broke his jaw?” Dad said after he had gotten back from the restaurant.

“He shot at James and I.”

“I know, I’m just surprised he got off with just a broken jaw. If I had been in your position and he placed your Aunt in a similar danger, he would be lucky enough to be able to walk unaided once I was through with him.”

“He was unconscious.” I shrugged

“Still is, and when he wakes up he will be manning a weather station in Alaska.”

 

****

 

The door slammed open and a black dressed man shot in, I sprang at him, nightsticks at the ready. He saw me and I found my self flattened against a wall, my arms pulled back behind my back. The two nightsticks sticking outwards, I rotated my grip to try and hit the guy holding me when a familiar voice said.

“Calm down, we’re here to rescue you.” He then whispered something incomprehensible to me and I felt calm spreading through me in a instant.

“Dad!” I dropped the sticks and twisted round in his loosening grip, and wrapped my arms around him. “I don’t like it here.”

“No. And you shouldn’t have been sent here.”

“I’m telling you, I didn’t know,” a familiar voice said.

 My body tensed. So did Dads. He pulled me in tighter and wouldn’t let go.

“How could you not know, Pink? It is all in her file.” Mum said.

“I’m telling you, the file I saw isn’t the one you showed me. If you had given me time I would have given you the file, and you could see for yourself.”

“Pink?”

“That’s right, Sara. The doctor you were supposed to see is a colour, and we thought, a friend.”

“Come on Black, that’s unfair. I honestly didn’t know. I mean, come on! The file didn’t mention either of you. And I did have orders. She showed absolutely no remorse.”

“Not here, Pink.”

“Oh my God. Did you do this? Come on, look at what she has done to these guards.”

“Sara, did you beat up these guards?” I looked up at my dad, I could imagine my tear streaked face.

“They threatened to rape me.” I whispered back.

 

****

That’s when the shit really hit the fan. It took Mum and Pink to stop Dad going crazy and finishing the job I had started. Of course, it then took Dad to stop Mum smacking Pink around when she heard why Dad was getting angry, which left me alone to hit her. Which I was able to do before collapsing in exhaustion. I woke up sprawled out on the back seat of the car, my head cradled on Mum’s lap, as she absently stroked my hair. I let my eyes drift shut again.

 

****

 

“Stop playing with it. You look fine.” My hand flicked away from the bodice, I had once again tried to pull up higher. “But …”

“Remember to keep your knees together.” I was sitting facing my mother and father in the back of the black limousine that had been sent to pick us up, I was facing backwards towards them, wondering why I was being dragged along. I kept trying to get the bodice to rise higher and cover up more of my breasts, but it was futile, no matter what I did, I still had cleavage. I sighed and pulled the dark blue wrap around to try and cover more.

“Is there a reason I have to attend this, and James doesn’t?”

“James has a party to attend. You, on the other hand didn’t make other plans,” Mum smiled.

“You are getting plain evil in your old age, Mother.”

“What do you mean, getting?” Dad asked with a grin.

“You two are treading on thin ice.”

“So, err, what exactly are you two? In case someone asks.” I sighed. I hated these things. Before, I had managed to get out of the few I was required to attend, but I’m getting the feeling it is going to get harder the older I get.

“I am the executive of operations and your mother is the personnel executive. No one should ask though.”

“Ok, and you’re both armed, because?” Mum’s eyes went wide and Dad chuckled.

“You want to take this one?” he asked her.

“Just in case something happens.” I rolled my eyes at Mum’s response and looked out the back window.

“How did you know we were armed?” Dad asked me, I looked at him in his Tuxedo then looked at mum in her black evening gown

“I saw the holster when Mum adjusted your tie back at home. If you’re armed, then I doubt Mum would go anywhere without something, so I just guessed that she was as well.” I saw Dad grin, then adjust his jacket. Mum looked at me with a strange look, which almost seemed like a grin that she was trying to hide. “So what do I have to look forward to?”

“Starts with an awards ceremony, followed by a simple meal.”

“Simple meal? Your father is understating. It’s a 5 course dinner by an internationally acclaimed chef.”

“The guy is a rank amateur. Can you believe he mixed Furglox with salmon? The meal, like all his others, is going to be simple and pretentious.”

“I liked the Furglox with the Salmon.”

“We know, Dear. You made it for us every Sunday for 3 months.”

“It did get a bit boring, Mum.”

“Well, you didn’t have to eat it.” Dad commented.

“Sure I did, I was 13 at the time. I wasn’t even allowed to leave the table till my plate was cleared.”

“It is often considered impolite to not clear your plate,” Mum said in a huff.

“Anyway, so we have a boring awards ceremony, followed by a pretentious dinner. Then ... ?” I asked.

“We then retire into the ball room for a night of dancing.” Mum said with a grin and stared at my father.

“Drinking and lots of talking about business.”

“And dancing.” Mum added.

“No, I don’t think we will have any time for that, Dear.”

“Oh?”

“Sorry, but we will be most busy.” Dad was staring out of the window, so his face wasn’t directly visible to Mum, but from my angle I could see him trying not to laugh.

“Michael Neumer, if you think for a moment I can’t see your face in the reflection in the privacy screen, you are most mistaken,” she said with her arms crossed.

Dad leant back, looked at her, and grinned. I rolled my eyes and looked out one of the side windows before they could kiss.

 

****

 

“Sara!” Mel smiled as she crossed over to me. She was also wearing a gown where the hem was just skimming the ground, only hers was a shade of crimson. She leant in and air-kissed me on the cheek, I followed her lead and returned it. “Thank God you’re here. I don’t think I could take any more of the sports talk.”

“Oh?” I said.

“Dad and Jimmy are discussing whatever game was on the radio just before we got here.”

“Really?” Dad asked with a grin. “Excuse me, ladies.”

“Err …” my eyes followed after him.

“Oh go. Sheesh, you’re such a guy.”

“Thanks, Mel, I love you, too.” I dashed after him and caught up just as he met with Mel’s father and her boyfriend.

“Good Evening, Mike, Sara.”

“Alright Pete and, Jimmy, wasn’t it? Who won?”

“Lakers, last minute rebound. O’Henry from under their own goal. Incredible shot.” Mel’s dad said.

“I’m telling you, it’s going to be disallowed, the ball changed direction mid air. Its going to be ruled outside interference. It will be a Sonics victory.”

“Nah,! that was just the angle the camera was looking at it from.”

 

****

 

“Oh great …” Dad sighed.

“What Dear? Oh Furglox and Salmon! I almost missed that.” Mum grinned.

“What are you going to have?” Mel asked me.

“Thinking about the roast lamb with the roast potatoes and the Yorkshire pudding.” I smiled as I stared down at the menu, my mouth starting to water at just the thought of it. “You?”

“Can’t decide, what is a Furglox?”

“Flying Rat.” Dad and I said at the same time.

“Flying Rat?” Mel gulped.

“Ignore these two troglodytes. Furglox is a Austrian delicacy, small winged …”

“Rat.” I finished for her.

“It is not a rat. It is actually a fish.” Mum said with finality. The 7 of us were sitting at the same table with an elderly couple, who were giving us a bit of a look.

“Its what you get if you cross a rat with a pigeon and give it gills, then replace its bone structure with air sacks.” I explained to Mel.

“I think BB was a bad influence on you, young lady. Or at least his father was.” Dad said with a grin.

“Mr. Baines was a laugh.”

“Mel, Furglox is an incredibly tasty dish,” my mum insisted.

“I can attest to that.” Mel’s mum said.

“It’s an acquired taste. One, I never could acquire. Mum and Kat could never get enough of it though.”

“It’s not a well known fact but the Furglox causes a chemical reaction in us girls. It releases endorphins that make us feel good about ourselves. I am quite surprised you didn’t enjoy it.” The older lady said with a smile. “It’s considered quite the aphrodisiac.” Mel, Jimmy and I started to grin, and from the looks Jimmy and Mel kept stealing each other, for the same reason.

“It’s off your menu.” Mel’s Mum said.

 

****

 

After our orders for dinner were taken, the awards ceremony started. It was going to be a dull ceremony. From the moment the guy in the suit got up on stage I knew this. He started talking in a dull monotonous tone that had no feeling to it. Fortunately I was sitting facing the stage so I was able to place elbows on the table with my head on my hands. I relaxed and slipped up into that comfortable place. The man's voice rose until it was chipmunk-like and he blurred as he moved around the podium a little. I couldn’t help but smile.

 

****

 

Dinner was surprisingly tasty, though Dad was quite right, it was a simple meal, presented in a pretentious way, with way too small portions, I was just starting to get a taste for a course when my plate would be empty.

 

****

 

I opened my eyes to look up at my father’s face as he carried me back indoors and up to my room. He laid me down in my bed, removed my shoes and then pulled the covers up over my body. I smiled at him.

“Thanks, Dad.”

“Night, Sweetie. If you need anything. ...”

“G’Night.” I let my eyes close as he shut the door on his way out. I sighed, reopened my heavy eyes and got out of bed. A trip to the bathroom allowed me to wipe off the residue of my day, the tear streaked makeup, I followed it up with a nice long shower where I scrubbed my flesh clean. I dried myself on the towel in the bathroom and vowed to invest in some of the big fluffy soft ones I had seen Mum use. Correction, I vowed to get my parents to invest in some big fluffy towels for me. My bed then embraced me as I collapsed into it and I was soon drifting off to sleep, a smile on my face.

 

****

 

A hand on my shoulder accompanied the, “May I have the pleasure of this dance?” question. It was about to be followed by my now standard, “No thank you, I’m OK.” When I turned to look him in the eyes, my resolved caved.

“I would love to.” He led me into the middle of the floor, slipped a strong arm around my waist, the other took my hand. My own free hand curled up around his neck and then he led me in the dance. I rested my head on the shoulder of his tailored tuxedo.

“You have been given a nickname by the guys our age here, you know.”

“Oh?” I replied.

“Yes ... Ice queen.”

“Haha, could be worse.”

“Oh?”

“They could know the truth about me.” I grinned, “You dance quite well.”

“So do you. I keep expecting you to try and lead, but you are just following.”

“I thought I would have flat feet from your big clumsy shoes, so what do you know?”

“I’m not big and clumsy,” he said with a sniff.

“Not big?”

“Well, OK, I am a little big, but only compared to you, Tiny.”

“All great things come in small packages.”

“Yes, they do.”

“So, Kail, when are you going to piss off all the self proclaimed Romeos and melt the ice queen’s heart with your kiss?”

“Oh, right about now, I should think.”

“About bloody time,” I managed before his lips covered mine and the song came to an end.

 

****

 

“Want to join us at our table?” The dancer floor was surrounded by lots of tables which could seat up to six people. Waiters were milling around refreshing people’s drinks. I nodded and he led me over to a table in the corner.

A pair of National Security men were standing nearby looking observant. An older man with more then a passing resemblance to Kail was sitting next to Kail’s Mother. Kail squeezed my hand affectionately.

“Mum, Dad. This is Sara.”

“Ahh, the girl I have heard so much about.”

“It is nice to see you again, Dear. You were very graceful out there.”

“Kail made it easy. I assure you, I am usually very much the klutz.”

“Modest, too. It is a pleasure to meet you, young lady. My son’s manners need work, it seems. I’m Charles McSammuel.” He stood up and offered his hand which I shook firmly. He nodded. “Sit, please. Can I get you a drink, Sara?”

“A glass of water would be nice, thank you.”

“Coke for me, Dad. Thanks.” One of the security men spoke briefly into his microphone and I saw a waitress walk over with a tall glass of water and an equally tall glass of coke.

 

****

 

I felt almost as if I was being interrogated by Kail’s father as he deftly started to ask questions about me. I kept my eyes on him and answered everything he asked me, truthfully and honestly. Well, as truthfully and honestly as I could. After a while, Kail’s mum placed a hand on her husband’s elbow and simply said ‘Dear.’ After that it became much more civilised.

“Would you like another dance?” Kail asked me, I looked at him and nodded.

As we got up Kail’s Mum, Lucy as she asked me to call her, said, “Sara, you must join us for dinner on Tuesday. Kail will fill you in on the details. Have fun you two.”

Kail led me down onto the dance floor. I once more slipped my arm around his, only this time both arms went around his neck and both his went around my waist for a slow one.

 

****

 

I heard the outer door open and the clicking of heels on the tiled floor.

“Can you believe that slut?” a voice said from the other side of the stall door.

“I know, throwing herself at him like that! It’s disgusting.”

“I heard the boys were calling her the Ice Queen before she danced with him.”

“What?” the first voice responded.

“Yeah! She turned down Barry, Michael, and even the very cute John,” a fourth voice added.

“To their faces?”

“Yep. And a bunch of wannabes as well, though after she burned John ...”

“I guess she is a little pretty, but nowhere near high enough in the right social circles to do that,” the first voice said. I pegged her as the ring leader. “Enough of her, though. What do we know about him.”

“Kail McSammuel. Related somehow to the Senator, though so far I have not been able to ascertain what sort of relationship. Enough that the SS let him through, and with, er, a guest as well, though.”

“That’s it?”

“The Mothers just grinned when I asked about him.”

I finished wiping, stood up, pulled my panties back up, glad that I was wearing stockings and that my panties went under my tail and not over it like the ones I had been going to wear. I made sure that my skirt, which I had held bunched up around my waist was fine, then hit the flush and stepped out of the cubicle in the ladies. The girls suddenly went very quiet. I looked around, there were 5 girls, all in glamorous outfits. I suddenly had the urge to redo my make up, so while all five watched me, I crossed to the sink, washed my hands and dried them on the towel there for the job.  I then opened my little clutch bag and pulled out my lip stick and carefully reapplied it.

“I’m Mary-Bella, and you ...” ‘you’ was said with the same tone you would use when describing shit on your shoe, “... are using ‘my’ ... mirror.” It was the voice I had heard first and it was coming from the blonde who was standing right next to me.

I looked at her reflection in the mirror. “It’s a big mirror. I’m sure we can share.”

“I’m sure we can’t.”

“I love your accent, is it British?” one of the other girls asked.

I nodded, also looking at her in the mirror. “I’m Dominique.”

I returned the lip stick to the purse as she paused for a moment. “Excuse me. My friends are waiting.” I stepped out the door and used my heel to stop it from completely closing.

“That bitch! How dare she snub us?”

I let the door close with a small smirk and headed back to where Kail, Mel and Jimmy were sitting. Sitting down, Kail took one look at me and passed me a clean tissue.

“Do this,” he said as he took a second and rolled his lips on it. “Gets the excess gloss off.”

“Oh. Cheers.” I smiled, doing as he suggested.

“You were a while,” Mel said.

“Seems like the local bitch squad have it in for me here, as well. It must be my face. Thought I would stir the waters a little.”

“Sara! What did you do?” Kail asked.

“Nothing,” I said innocently.

“Nothing? Then why are they sending dirty looks our way?”

“I didn’t do anything, I swear. Just treated them with the contempt they deserve. Did you know I’m apparently a slut, and an Ice Queen?”

“I heard the Ice Queen part, got warned not to approach you by a couple of the guys who used to try and hit on me when I was Kait. They told me you were burning everyone who came at you.”

“Well? I have a boyfriend. Which reminds me, they don’t know who you are. And who are ‘the Mothers?’ ” I leaned over and kissed Kail lightly.

“The Mothers? Jeez. I can’t believe they are still referring to them as that. They are the women who organise these little events. They know everyone who is here and who they are related to.”

“Little?” I asked, looking at the large number of people here

“Relatively.” He grinned. “They do organise bigger parties, for what they consider ‘the upper class,’ Mary-Bella is a fine example of someone thinking she is upper class. Most people our age kow-tow to her.”

“Most?”

“Yeah, it was that, or be ostracised and never be invited to another party.”

“Oh?”

“Her mum ‘was’ the head Mother.”

“Oh.”

“Yep. Now it’s my mum,” said Mel with a grin.

“Dominique. You are looking well.” Kail said, looking up at the person who had walked up behind me.

“Thank you. I’m sorry. I don’t think we have met,” she said with a little smile.

“Domi, I’m sure you remember Kait. Well this is the new and improved version,” Mel said, her grin not fading once.

“I don’t understand.”

“Morfs.” Kail said.

“You’re joking.”

“What can we do for you, Domi? It’s not like you to come slum with us peons,” Jimmy said in a somewhat bitter tone

“That’s unfair. I never called you a peon.”

“No, Mary-Bitcha did though, and you backed her up.” I saw Mel squeeze his thigh.

“Well … I’ve come to warn you. Mary-Bitcha, erm, bella is really pissed with your new friend.”

“Why are you telling us … ?”

“Because she left her purse behind.” She put it down in front of me. “I’m sorry, but I couldn’t stop her.” I opened it up to find the contents of the various makeup items had been emptied into the bag and smeared around.

“Ahh, damn. My make-up’s ruined.” I said with a grin.

“Sara!” Mel said shocked.

I tried to stop myself from laughing. “Ahh Shucks, Guess I’m going to have to go without,” I snickered.

“Dom, meet Sara, she’s been a girl about as long as I have been a boy,” Kail said, with a grin. “She still has her priorities messed up.”

“That would explain the slowness putting on that lipstick. We thought you were doing it to wind up MB.”

“Added benefit,” I said. “I never liked bitchy girls when I was a guy. That hasn’t changed.”

 

****

 

“SARA! Watch out.” I heard called out, I was dancing with Kail, and turned to look in the direction of the shout. Mary-Bella was standing in front of me, an empty glass in her hand, the contents of the glass floating mid-air between us, a look of determination being replaced by a look of confusion. I looked at the red fluid, it looked like it would stain. I thought I had slipped into that place that slows the world down, yet I could still see in colour and people were moving around us. The glass left MB’s unresisting hand and scooped up the red drink, then floated down into her hand.

“I suggest you go,” Kail said. He waited until she got far enough away, then I felt him slump.

 

****

 

“Drink this. You just pushed yourself a little hard there. You need to practice your skills. Telekinesis is like a muscle, you need to work at it to get it stronger, but not push yourself.” Mum held the glass to Kail’s lips. I was propping him up in one of the seats. “He’ll be fine. Fluids are one of the hardest things to control, many TKs struggle with them. All he has done is push himself too hard.”

“Oh, thank God. When he started to collapse I was so worried,” Kail’s Mum said from the other side of Kail.

“We’ll take him home if you would like,” offered Jimmy.

 

****

 

“How do you feel?” I looked at the immaculate blonde, her pink blouse tucked into a dark red business skirt. Her hair tied back, pink rimmed tinted spectacles frame her eyes. I knew at least one of them was black, but covered with heavy concealer.

“You going to start that crap again?”

“Sara!” Mum said from across the room.

“I’m sorry Sara. I made a mistake, but I want to make amends.”

“Oh, and that makes it all OK then, does it?”

“Sara! Manners. She has apologised and …”

“And I don’t give a fuck. She shot me with a tranq, and handed me over to a mental hospital as a ‘convicted criminal.’ And you, Mother, expect me to trust her?”

“Sara. I, I guess I shouldn’t have dragged you here today.”

I looked down at my school uniform, then turned on Pink, “You want to know how I feel? Fine. In the past 10 days I have been shot at, knocked out, had my boyfriend, for fuck sake, I have a boyfriend now as well. ... had my boyfriend and best friend kidnapped right in front of me, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. This is not even mentioning trying to come to grips with now being a girl, learning to apply makeup, learning how to walk and move in a totally different way to the one I am used. ...

“You want to know how I feel? I feel terrible. I feel like shit. I constantly wonder whether it is worth it all. I have to wear this godawful uniform most of the day, 5 days a week. I have boys staring at me, undressing me with their eyes. What scares me and worries me, is that part of me enjoys it. What is really worrying, is that while I want to go and knock these gits out, part of me likes being stared at. I think that is what scares me the most.

“Kail, am I being fair to him? Are we even right for each other? I mean, how screwed up is our relationship? Kait was a really nice girl  I started going out with and now she, is a he, and my boyfriend.

“I have a boyfriend, does this make me gay? Or because he was a girl, does that make me straight? Although saying that, I have looked at other guys recently and thought, ‘he has a nice ass’. Was I deluding myself all these years? I don’t know who I am any more and you sit there, looking all smug, then you ask me how I feel?

“I feel like ripping something apart. I feel like hitting something till I can’t hit it anymore. I feel like breaking things, destroying things. I feel like going on a rampage and taking my anger out on anything and everything that gets in my way.”

“So why don’t you?” asked Pink, looking at me over the rims of her spectacles, her pen resting just above the surface of the paper of her pad.

“Her.” I nodded my head at my mother. “No matter the shitty things she has done to me in the last few days.”

“Sara!” my mother said in shock.

I ignored her. “I want my parents respect, and I doubt I’ll get that, giving into my instincts. I want my friends to be my friends because they want to, not because I hold them in fear of me, and above all else, because no matter how much I think it will make me feel better at the time, I know in the long run, violence is not the solution.”

“An interesting statement from someone who drove a bike through a window and, while mid flight, shot over 10 men.”

“With tranq darts.” I stated.

“Like what I used.”

“there was a difference! They were armed, and ready to kill. I was not. They had my friends, you just had your ego.”

“So it’s fine to use violence when you feel like it.”

“No, it’s fine to use violence when it is used against you.”

“You said violence is not the solution.”

“No, I said it’s not a long term solution. Short term, it can give you the space you need to come about to a non-violent long term solution.”

“Well, our time is up, I’ll see you next Sunday.”

“No, you won’t.. I don’t intend to ever see you again.”

 

****

 

“Sara …”

“Yes, Mum.”

“I, ... We are proud of you. You do realise that?”

I looked at my mum, and tilted my head. “I know Mum. It just hurts sometimes, you know. Where are we going?”

“You’re off for the rest of the morning, so I thought a little mother daughter bonding was in order.”

“What?”

“Retail therapy.”

“Err ...”

“Best way to heal rifts.”

“But I have already spent my clothing allowance.”

 

****

 

“Where do you want to start?” Mum asked me as we strolled in through the shopping mall’s entrance.

“How about the restaurant? I haven’t eaten yet.”

“What? Why not?”

“Would you believe, I’m watching my figure?”

“No.”

“There was nothing I wanted.”

“I brought you some cereal on Saturday.”

“No, We have only got those icicles things that Kat likes, and he got the last of the bread.”

“You like them as well. I get them for both of you.”

“No, I think it tastes like sugared cardboard.”

“But they always go down like the two of you are eating them.”

“What do you think Kat eats for a snack? Aghh! This is exactly what I was talking about. When was the last time you ever paid attention to what ‘I’ eat? Sometimes it feels like I don’t exist to you. It’s always Kat this, Kat that. It’s always about how she feels, what she wants. It was bad enough when she was my little sister. Well at least I know who your favourite is.”

“How ... dare ... you!”

 I looked at my mum sharply. Her tone was hurt, and her face looked pained, she had tears on her cheeks. “I love you and Kat exactly the same. Kat may be my baby, but you are my first born. If it seems like I coddle her more, its simply because she, agh, no HE needs it more. James isn’t anywhere near as independent as you are. He needs our support.”

“And I don’t?” I asked, tears in my eyes. Mum had manoeuvred me onto a bench and wrapped her arms around me.

“That’s not what I meant. I just meant that you always come to us when you need help. You are taking this harder then we thought you were, I’m sorry.”

“Mum …”

“No, I have been pushing you when I shouldn’t have been, and thinking about it, we have been giving James more support. It just seems like he needs it more. You don’t see it but he has always looked up to you, and never does anything intentionally that he thinks would make him look less in your eyes but James has really taken his transformation hard. I’m not saying you haven’t, but you don’t cry yourself to sleep each night. The first day he snuck his girls uniform out and changed into it at school.”

“He did what?”

“Yep, just before handing his form in. He doctored his form, the school rang because they thought it was a bit strange. That and the notification of name change being used to change his name from Katherine to Katherine.”

“I can’t believe he tried that. What’s worse, I can’t believe I didn’t think of it. Damn, I could still be in trousers.”

“No you wouldn’t, young lady. You would get the same offer we offered your brother. One year of living in your present sex, fully, embracing it, totally. And if you still feel the same we would look into the medical options.”

“Kat wants that?”

“James would be on the hormones already, but has agreed to live as a boy and at least experience it. Would you go back?”

“In a heartbeat.”

“Really?” Mum seemed surprised.

“Jeez, Mum, let’s see, 2 more years of having to wear skirts all day, 5 days a week, versus nice warm trousers, I’m going to ignore colleges which enforce a dress code in this. Also, I’ll take not being stared at, constantly, by so many men.”

“Now I know you did your fair share of staring.”

“That was different.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, it wasn’t me being stared at then.”

“Oh?”

“Yep, big difference.” I nodded, “You know you could at least try to look like you are agreeing me.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Make us closer?”

“Nope. Come on, lets get some food, I need to get closer to my daughter.”

“Are you sure you want to do that? She is real troublemaker you know. Seems to have been on an emotional roller coaster recently.”

“I hear she has a really nasty temper, as well .”

“Only for people who try to hurt her friends and family.” I grinned back at her as we made our way towards the food court.

 

****

 

“Mum! I can’t believe you really did that?”

“He had it coming.”

“I heard a rumour, but I didn’t put much credit to it. So that’s why he walks with a limp.”

“No. That was your father, after I told him why I had kicked him.”

“Wait, I thought Uncle Mattey was a regenerator.”

“He is, which is why both your father and I think he fakes it when we are around. Enjoying that?”

“Yep, Beans and cheese jacket. My favourite.”

“I can’t believe you have cleared your plate so quickly?”

“Hey what can I say? I’m a growing girl.”

“Bitch. Well don’t come crying to me when your new clothes don’t fit and you don’t have the budget to buy new ones.”

“No, I’ll just go crying to Dad like Kat used to.”

“You think that will work?”

“Always worth a try,” I shrugged.

 

 

****

 

“Well here we are, back at school in time for the afternoon lessons.”

“Cheers, Mum, you are all heart. Sure you don’t want me to give you a hand taking your shopping in.”

“It’s two bags. I think I can manage.” she leant over and kissed me on the cheek. As I got out the car “I enjoyed that. Thank you. Its good to know I haven’t completely lost you.”

“Mum.  I …” I was lost for what to say, I’d had a good time and we had come to an agreement on how far Mum could meddle directly in my life.

“Nope. Don’t say anything. Oh, and before I forget, your Father asked me to tell you that you start tonight. School uniform will be acceptable till you buy yourself a good suit.”

“What?”

“You need to pay us back for the clothes you destroyed over the last few days, and those few un-necessaries you wanted.”

“But ...”

“Go on, you don’t want to be late.”

“Mum! Start what?”

“Part time job, Sweetie. Filing for your father.” With that, she pulled away.

“Buggerations.” I muttered as I made my way towards the school gates.

 

****

 

“Hey, beautiful. How about you and I go out some time,” I heard as a hand snaked itself around my waist, and came to rest on my arse. I rolled out and faced towards the owner of the hand. James.

“Not interested. I’m already dating someone.”

“That chump McSammuel isn’t a real man. It’s a ’she’. Do yourself a favour and dump that ex-pussy.” He moved closer and went to put his arm around me again.

“Excuse me? That’s not only my boyfriend you are insulting there, but also my friend.” I grabbed the arm and twisted it. “And quite frankly, keep this up and you will regret it.”

“Hey, Jimmy, that ‘Girl’ you are hitting on, used to be a boy. It’s just as much a freak as McSammuel.” I heard Chastity call out.

“What?” A number of people, as always in situations like, this stopped to look at the situation, which meant there were a number of people laughing.

“You might remember me. Just over 2 weeks ago I floored you with a single punch,” I grinned as his eyes went wide.

“You? I’ve been looking for you!” His face was suddenly an expression of anger.

“Well hit her, then.” Chastity shouted out.

“I can’t hit a girl.”

“It’s not a girl, moron. It’s a fucking animal.” Something clicked in his eyes and I saw him throw a punch in my direction. Part of me acknowledged the gasps from the crowd, but mostly I just switched into automatic. The punch was clumsy, I moved just out of its way. He threw another which I ducked under, then shifted under his outstretched arm and slipped behind him. He spun and tried to hit me again, I ducked and slid away from him.

“Fuckin’ bitch, stand still!” a voiced growled behind me and I felt arms grabbing hold of me and stopping me from moving. I struggled against their grip, but I was outweighed, and I couldn’t get the leverage I needed to make use of my above average strength.

“Good one, Pete,” said a now smiling James as he cocked his fist back to hit me.

Life is funny, here I was being held by a muscle bound idiot with way too good a grip, and the first thing that goes through my head made me start to laugh. My head crashed back into the chest of the guy behind me as James’ fist hit my face. I could feel my eye start to swell up.

“BASTARD!” I heard my little brother shout as he pushed his way through the crowd, “Leave my sister alone.”

“Make me, little shit!” The older boy laughed, just before my little sibling kicked his feet out from under him. He went down with an umph. The older James stood up and turned on the younger boy, who had dropped into a fighting stance I recognised as one of our mothers. “I’m going to kill you for that, you little shit.” He swung at my brother. I let out a growl and the world dimmed.

****

 


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